Kingdom Of Style

Put your hands together for Pot Noodle...

The advert for Doner Kebab Pot Noodle (yes really) to be precise...

You couldn't pay me to eat a pot noodle, but the advert made me laugh out loud, really loudly!

Does this remind you of anyone?

Comedy noodle genius!

An amused Queen Marie

The Women...

What a waste of celluloid!

 Annette Bening , Candice Bergen , Eva Mendes , Meg Ryan , Debra Messing - not a decent turn among them.  It was a heap of trite tripe.

And although you can't really see it on the poster, Miss Meg could hardly move her face. If she's not careful, she too could be on the Wildenstein path.

The only good thing about the film, was that Annette Bening was wearing an Elsa Peretti Bone Cuff, which prompted me to go prowling for mine...

Queen Marie

Why Wilhelmena why?

Watching an Ugly Betty rerun, I am laughingly forced to ask why?

Why has no-one pointed out to Wilhelmena Slater, Editor in Chief that with every passing episode she becomes more orange.

 Not just a little bit orange but a big bit orange!

Holy Crap Wilhelmena! you're an Oompa Loompa

 

Oh Sod it! she's right...

Queen Marie

"Knox Oil and Gas..."*

I'm posting this today to give you a heads up for Sunday.
The Observer newspaper is giving away, one of my all time favourite films Local Hero tomorrow

Local Hero is a 1983 Scottish comedy film starring Peter Riegert, Denis Lawson and Burt Lancaster. It was directed by Bill Forsyth ( you may be more familiar with his film Gregorys Girl)
Mac" MacIntyre (Peter Riegert) is a typical 1980s hot-shot executive working for Knox Oil and Gas in Houston, Texas. His lavish apartment is furnished with all the latest modern gadgets.
The eccentric chief of the company, Felix Happer (Burt Lancaster), sends MacIntyre to Scotland to acquire the village of Ferness to make way for a refinery, largely because his surname sounds Scottish.
Mac teams up with Danny and starts the negotiations, the locals are keen to get their hands on the 'Silver Dollar' and can't believe their luck. However a local hermit and beach scavenger, Ben Knox, lives in a shack on the crucial beach which he also owns. Happer is more interested in the Northern Lights and Danny in a surreal girl with webbed feet, Marina...

This is a gem of a film, like all of Forsyths film, small but with enormous heart, humor and wit. It is also a treat to look at and truly lifts the spirit.
If you have not seen this film yet, you are in for a wonderful treat. This has put me in the notion to watch all of Forsyths films again...

See you at the newsagents...

Queen Marie

* The first time I saw the film, I was stunned by the glamour of the Houston Offices and the receptionists who would answer every call with the texas drawl "Knox Oil and Gas"
. I decided that if the nun or librarian option didn't work out for me when I grew up, I would move to Texas and get a job as a receptionist in an oil company. I also answered the phone with that refrain for about three years straight afterwards, which pissed my mother off no end. (bonus!)

Have you met this little mermaid yet?

This is Ponyo.
She is the latest creation from Hayao Miyazake.

Ponyo is a girl fish with a human face who decides one day to leave her underwater home — and her school of smaller sisters — to see what lies on the surface. Riding on the back of a jellyfish, she is nearly trapped by a drift net, but escapes — with her head stuck in a glass jar. Sosuke, a boy who lives on a house on a seaside cliff, spots Ponyo in the shallows and rescues her. He is delighted with his new pet — and Ponyo is delighted to be in the human world at last. She says her first words, to Sosuke's astonishment — and begins a transformation from half-fish to human.

The film was shown and won a special award earlier this month at The Venice Film Festival.

Of the film Miyazake said-
"Ponyo On The Cliff places Hans Christian Andersen’s The Little Mermaid in a contemporary Japanese setting. It is a tale of childhood love and adventure.
A little seaside town and a house at the top of a cliff. A small cast of characters. The ocean as a living presence. A world where magic and alchemy are accepted as part of the ordinary.
The sea below, like our subconscious mind, intersects with the wave-tossed surface above. By distorting normal space and contorting normal shapes, the sea is animated not as a backdrop to the story, but as one of its principal characters.
A little boy and a little girl, love and responsibility, the ocean and life - these things, and that which is most elemental to them, are depicted in the most basic way in Ponyo On The Cliff. This is my response to the afflictions and uncertainty of our times."

I don't know when she will be heading my way, but I am looking forward to meeting her...

Queen Marie

Lars and The Real Girl...

As part of my blossoming love affair with all things Canadian, I want to talk about a very special film that was filmed in various locations in Ontario and premiered at the Toronto International Film Festival in September last year.

Lars and the Real Girl, is a heartwarming and heartbreaking story. A small ,quiet and poignant film that teems with quiet desperation and true heart

Lars Lindstrom played by Ryan Gosling is a good man. He lives in the garage in his parents' house while his brother and sister-in-law - Gus and Karen - live in the main house, following their parents' death. Although he is kind to everyone, he epitomizes shyness and avoids any human contact with the town. While the people in the town pressure him to talk to the new girl at his work, Margo, he's too introverted. While at work one day, Lars' perverted coworker mentions a Real Doll that can be purchased to model an actual woman. Six weeks later an enormous crate is delivered to Lars' home.

That same evening, Lars knocks at Karin and Gus' door. "I have a visitor," he says, proud as can be. But when he produces his friend, she turns out to be not what anyone expected. "This is Bianca," he says, introducing a fully dressed, anatomically correct, life-size silicone doll. "She's not from here."

As Karin and Gus look on astonished, Lars explains that Bianca is a Brazilian/Danish missionary he met online who has to get around in a wheelchair and, because she is as religious as Lars, will have to sleep in the big house.

Despite the concerns of his friends and relatives, the local doctor, played to perfection by Patricia Clarkson tells them all that Lars is suffering from a delusion, - "Bianca's in town for a reason," and everyone who cares about Lars is going to have to deal with that."
She explains that since Lars otherwise has a highly functional personality that threatens no one, this delusion is a sign that he is working through some personal issues and his loved ones should play along in the meantime. With some persuasion, the entire town eventually participates as well with growing enthusiasm for this unusual, but enjoyable, activity as Lars continues to pursue what he perceives as a deep and meaningful relationship with the doll.
The joy of this film is 'capraesque', a small town pulling together to help one of their own, using love, support and friendship to help heal and repair the heart, spirit and soul of the damaged Lars.

If you have not seen this very special film ,make a point of seeing it very very soon.
Lars and The Real Girl - it's a real joy...

Queen Marie
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Absolutely Fabulous Darling!

Last night I noticed UKTV Gold was showing a re-run of the New Year episode of Absolutely Fabulous.

The show first aired way back in 1992 and I watched it religiously as the hapless fashion PR Edina Monsoon and Editor Patsy Stone make complete fools of themselves in the business of fashion.

Eddie's dreadful attempts at trying to squeeze herself, sausage-like, into all manner of hideous of-the-moment trendy ensembles were totally hilarious, whilst the sharp tongued, ex-model, coke addicted, anorexic Patsy, who "hasn't eaten since 1974",  navigates her way through life in a drink induced haze in complete denial about her age.

As I watched the show though I must admit their outfits didn't seem quite as ridiculous as before! Eddie was wearing some PVC trousers (although teamed with a dreadful zebra-print jacket) and Patsy was wearing a fabulous leather tuxedo jacket and silver trousers. My Prince always used to say I was Patsy - good god he was right!!!

I hope UKTV Gold show more re-runs of the programme as it really was one the one the funniest send-ups of the fashion industry I think I've ever seen.

Of course since then I have never been able to speak about Christian Lacroix without saying "Lacroix sweetie, Lacroix".

Queen Michelle

Anna Wintour and The Chocolate Factory...

Tim Burton recently said that Johnny Depp modelled his haircut on La Wintour because he wanted to "scare people". Job done young man, job done!
Charlie and the Chocolate factory is on tonight at 7pm and although it isn't a patch on the original, it is still worth a watch.

Especially for young Freddie Highmore who plays Charlie Bucket and would bring tears to a glass eye when he says "But I only get one bar a year" *sob sob*

Queen Marie

It's so deeply wrong on so many levels...

I scarcely know where to start!

Flicking through the channels trying to find a film, I just came across Justin Timbersnake at Madison Square Garden with his Future Sex/Love Show. Now I can't say I'm a Justin fan unlike my mother who thinks "he's a great wee singer and dancer" but loooking at the stage and the size of the live orchestra in the pit, you can't deny the boy knows how to put on 'a show'

The phone goes and it's my mum calling to see how I'm feeling.
Me-" Oh I'm surprised it's you, wee Justin is on just now singing and dancing his heart out"
Mum- "Och I know, it's a repeat, I've already seen it and anyway your Dad bought me the DVD of the concert at Christmas time"

*stunned silence*
*tumbleweeds*

Queen Marie

"Oh my God! she's fashion roadkill..."

It's official, I have been sucked back in by Sex in the City.
About once a year, I dust off the box set, start at Episode 1 and work all the way through. But this time I thought, I'll just have a wee blast, I'll only watch Season 6. Less than a freakin' week later and I'm already on Season 4. I should have known better, when you start you just can't stop.

This is my second favourite episode, not just because of the fashion roadkill but because it features the very special Kevyn Aucoin. Despite the fact that I don't like make-up, I loved and adored Kevyn Aucoin. In life there are people who you wish you had met, I wish I had met him! He died in 2002 when he was only 40.
This beautiful book tells you more...

Kevyn Aucoin: a beautiful life chronicles the magical journey of this makeup guru as seen through the eyes of his family, friends, lovers, and fashion-industry insiders. It traces his beginnings in a Louisiana orphanage, where his unmarried sixteen-year-old mother placed him for adoption, to the mysterious illness that tragically ended his life at the age of forty.

Aucoin grew up in Lafayette, Louisiana, to parents Thelma and Isidore, who adopted him as an infant. Inspired by his difficult childhood in a homophobic Southern town, he chose to see beauty everywhere -- in all faces, races, and sexualities. For Kevyn, who struggled his entire life with feelings of inadequacy, inner beauty was as important as the physical beauty that surrounded him. He struggled his way to the top of the professional makeup industry by emphasizing the beauty within. His motto was that it was far more important to help a woman feel beautiful no matter what, and that makeup was simply his tool for helping her discover herself.

As his former partner and one-time agent, Jed Root, put it: "Kevyn knew how to make people comfortable in their own skin. It was his personality to see the beauty inside everybody."

That's a real gift and something we should all try to do - 'see the beauty inside everybody'

Queen Marie
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