To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, a time to reap that which is planted;
A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;
A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
A time to sell Easter Eggs, a time to sell chocolate
A time to sell sun tan lotion, a time to sell snow shoes...
Retailers never pay attention to the Bible
Whether through studpidity, desperation or greed, the net result is the same - stores filled with unseasonable merchandise.
Not slighty unseasonal
Massively unseasonal. Epic, rage inducing unseasonable.
Before Santa had even started loading this sleigh with gifts for all the good girls and boys , the buffoons at Marks and Spenscers saw fit to start filling the shelves with Easter Eggs. Feckin' Easter Eggs!
I screeched so loudly, shop assistants came running, convinced I had been crushed under a falling pile of Christmas puddings...
But worse was to come.
Much worse .
I went into Boots the other day, and as I stood there, with the snow melting off my boots onto the tiled floor, what met my unbeleieving eye was stupidity as far as the eye could see.
Row after never ending row of sodding sun tan lotion...
It's unacceptable. Totally feckin' Unacceptable.
I also can't see how it makes economic sense. It's still Janauary people.
I'm sure they sell a couple of bottles to simpletons but not sufficent quantities of it, to account for all the valuable shelf space it was taking up.
What happened here? could they not find anyuthing else in the stockroom...
I'm thinking we should have some kind of "Scale of Seasonal Acceptability"
On that scale, the stocking and displaying of any product shall only be deemed acceptable one month before the event. Any event! be it Valentines, Easter, or Mothers Day.
Any period longer than a month shall result in a visit from The Palace Guards, who will quite simply trash your shop and confiscate all of your products.
So Boots, you are kicking the arse out of it, to say the least, trying to punt this stuff almost six months ahead of time.
Sort it out retailers. Sort it out.
You have been warned.
A very cross Queen Marie